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Sep 14, 2020

On this episode of the Marina Perry Podcast, Lauren Violet, a somatic sex and relationships coach, joins Marina to dive into the topics of sex, sexuality, and stepping into full sexual expression despite common social conditioning and the social stigma around taboo topics. Lauren works in what she refers to as the dark side of sexuality: BDSM; the adult entertainment industry; kink; and all things taboo.  


What is a somatic sex and relationship coach and what do they do? Lauren explains that she guides people through any sexual or relationship blocks they are currently experiencing. She helps her clients through guided self-body work and coaches them to reach their full sexual potential as well as push through any limiting blockages to become fully embodied in their sexuality.


You will know if you have a block if you are having a desire for more, Lauren explains. For example, you may be experiencing a block if you: have difficulty orgasming; have difficulty becoming erect or maintaining an erection; or if you are experiencing identity/sexuality dysphoria, confusion, or frustration. 


What is sexual energy? Lifeforce energy, eros, or sexuality energy, as Lauren calls it, is also creative energy. Sexual energy can ultimately create life, but it can also create something out of nothing: a dance; a delicious family meal; a piece of art; a creative workout; etc.. This powerful energy can also be misused and abused, which will incite fear in some people. Sex or sexual feelings are often socially coded as taboo, and we are traditionally told to repress these feelings or curiosities. So, how can we overcome these fears to reclaim this raw power? Lauren suggests we become more aware of our dark (or toxic) energies, as well as any toxic behaviors and tendencies we might rely on; especially when it comes to seeking external validation from others. Communication, as well, is an easy first step in assuring that you and your partner are on the same page—even unrelated to sex, specifically—and that you are both getting what you want and need within this relationship.


Communication with and within yourself is also crucial to gaining a deeper relationship and understanding of your sexual needs, wants, and desires. Marina touches on the power of social conditioning and how it affects the way in which we communicate with others, even our most trusted or loved ones, and asks Lauren to explain to listeners how to overcome socialized or conditioned negative thoughts, feelings, and behaviors around sex and sexual expression.     


What You Will Learn

  1. What a somatic sex and relationships coach is, and how they may help you work through sexual ore relationship-related blocks in your life.
  2. Lauren will define what sexual energy is to her and within her line of work, and break down common concerns she sees with her clients
  3.  You will have a relationship tool to add to your connection toolkit: RBDSM (relationship; boundaries; desires; STI/STD status; meaning (or aftercare.)
  4. How to explore within yourself to deepen your relationship with your body


External Links

Watch the documentary, Kink:


Grace Code Human Potential Practitioner Training: 


Social Media 

Let me know what you want to hear on future episodes, or tag me in a screenshot on Instagram @iammarinaperry. 


Follow Lauren on Instagram: @thelaurenviolet

Or, check out her website: